New dad: “My mother-in-law hates the name I chose for my child and wants me to change it”
A new father has butted heads with his mother-in-law
after she told him that she hates the name he chose for her grandson and
refuses to call the child by it.
Becoming a parent is one of the most exhilarating moments in a person’s life. However, welcoming a new child into the world brings with it a whole lot of stress as well.
Feeding and bathing the baby, buying strollers and car seats, preparing the nursery and adapting to the sleepless nights is no easy feat. But, for one new dad, his mother-in-law has been the biggest headache after she stopped using her grandson’s name and begged her daughter and son-in-law to change it.
Choosing a name for a new baby is always a difficult decision, but when the new parents finally decided on one, the child’s grandmother was not happy with the decision.
The man, who has remained anonymous, took to social media platform Reddit to share his frustrations with the world. He told users on the site that his mother-in-law wanted to name the baby Sherman, but the couple opted for Alexander – a name she hates. Now, the household is tense and the man decided to get some advice from strangers on the internet who are subjective about the issue.
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"Me (~30M) and my wife (~30F) recently had a baby. Over the past 3 months, her mother (~60F) has been a constant presence in helping us around the house,” the man types. “It has been very helpful, and we have been very thankful, especially as my wife had a long recovery due to some complications. Her mother has always wanted us to name the baby "Sherman" to honour her father.”
The man adds that "Quite simply, we just didn't like the name, and so we declined and ultimately named him "Alexander" However, over the last couple of weeks I have noticed her increasingly calling him variations of "Sherman" (e.g., Lil Sherm)... to him and to us. I have asked her gently and firmly to stop doing so. My wife has talked to her also. No change. A few days ago, I made a big deal out of it. Talked about how disrespectful it was, how if she wasn't willing to call him his real name, she could leave. She did.”
Admitting that things have gotten out of hand, the man had a Zoom chat with his mother-in-law where he apologised for his outburst. "I however, did not apologize for insisting for her to call him the right name. She did not apologize for not calling him the right name,” he says. "Instead, she came with a compromise. That we give him the middle name "Sherman".
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The man asked users if he should buckle under the pressure or stand his ground. "This is insanity,” one user wrote. “If the name was very special to your wife I'd suggest using it as a second middle name. In this situation absolutely not!”
Another added: "It will not only be an ugly addition to your son's name but it will give grandma the legitimization of her bad behavior. She will call him Sherman because it's 'his name'."
A third agreed, adding: "By compromising you're enabling her toxic entitlement. She openly disrespects your wishes and parenting role."
What do you think the man should do? Let Vic know in the comments section below.
Image credit: Pixabay