Confession: "My new partner wants a child but I don’t want more kids”

Confession: "My new partner wants a child but I don’t want more kids”

Single mom Sarah is in love, but her boyfriend's baby fever threatens to derail their happiness.

Mom and child
ChristinLola / iStock

Finding love as a single parent is fantastic! But what happens when your new partner has a baby-shaped hole in their heart and yours is firmly filled with independence? 

This is the dilemma facing Sarah, a 28-year-old mom whose boyfriend yearns for fatherhood.

Sarah has poured her heart into raising her son and now, with him in Grade 5, she's finally found a sense of freedom. However, her boyfriend's desire for a child has been pressuring her, pushing Sarah towards drastic solutions like secretly getting her tubes tied.

Sarah sent Stacey and J Sbu the following: 

I am a 28-year-old single mother of one who I had when I was very young, and I’m done with having more kids. My son is in grade 5 now, and we live a good life. My boyfriend (35) has no children, and he is desperate to have a child. I don’t want to have any more children, as I finally have the freedom that comes with having older children.

I am feeling the pressure of him wanting a child, and since I’m set on not having more, I suggested he get someone else pregnant, we maintain our relationship because I love him, but I’m not willing to sacrifice myself or my life for this need. I am even thinking of tying my tubes without him knowing.

This situation requires open communication and maybe the option of finding a middle ground. Maybe they could explore fostering a child?

Ultimately, the key is respecting each other's desires. Building a future together means compromise, but not self-sacrifice. While we’re no experts in this realm, we do believe that if their dreams of parenthood remain miles apart, a tough decision might be necessary.

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