Best wedding RSVP card ever

When it comes to wedding trends, nowadays it's all about the destination wedding. Which is annoying for most guests because of travel expenses and paper-work involved.

Melbourne-based couple, Michael and Wendy, are making a bit of a joke of it, even though they plan on getting married in China - where the bride-to-be was born.

Included with the RSVP cards were some hilarious options guests could check as reasons why they were or weren't going to be attending.

You had the options for "Yes":

"Yes! I/We will be attending because:

- It's another destination wedding! Please somebody invite me to a wedding in Antarctica so I can complete my 7 weddings, 7 continents bucket list item.
- By an amazing coincidence, I have a work conference in Shanghai at exactly the same time, fully funded by my employer including business class air fares.
- Mike promised to deliever a heartfelt speech and song in Mandarin language. I'd like to record it and ridicule him for the remainder of his days."

And the options for "No": 

“No, I/we will unfortunately be unable to attend because:

— It’s another f*****g destination wedding! Back in my day, it was reasonable to decline a wedding in Yarra Glen on the grounds of distance and the cost of a bus fare.
— I’m a wanted fugitive in China. It was an innocent mix-up. I kept yelling ‘FORK’ as I can’t get the hang of those blasted chopsticks ...
— I’m stricken with fear that the 7 course wedding banquet will not contain my Chinese staples of honey chicken and beef black bean, but rather will include duck’s tongue, pig’s blood soup and tiger’s spleen.”