BCCSA warns Carte Blanche

*Please note:  NOT TRUE and written purely for the purposes of humour. Any similarity to other incidents is coincidental. 
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The BCCSA has given Combined Artists until the end of October to replace or completely remove the well-known theme tune.

Combined Artists is the production company behind South Africa’s most successful ever investigative series.

The BCCSA argued South Africans had become unfairly conditioned and psychologically traumatised by Carte Blanche’s hard-hitting opening jingle since 1988.

BCCSA deputy chairperson, Brian Makeketa said he had received more than 10 000 complaints from the public, as well as a formal recommendation from the South African Society of Psychiatrists (SASOP).

Makeketa said, “We cannot ignore the evidence before us. SASOP reports no less than 80% of M-Net subscribers had reported uncontrollable feelings of anxiety at 7pm every Sunday, with some having to retreat to storm water drains to escape the music.”

SASOP claimed too that within the last month alone, over 1500 South Africans had tried to remove their ears when the jingle started, with some even reportedly trying to climb into their microwave ovens.

South Africans have become conditioned to associate the opening few seconds of the jingle with the last few seconds of the weekend.

Combined Artists part-owner George Mazarakis said it was a pity and described it as ‘the death of a legend.’

Mazarakis said he was currently in talks with upbeat Russian pop outfit t.A.T.u. but that nothing had yet been penned.

(Above: Carte Blanche’s theme tune has gained notoriety on social media recently due to its timing. Correction: DEREK.)

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