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Relationships: Signs that he is not ready to commit

You are in a relationship and would love to take it to the next level, but you are not sure if your partner feels the same way? Do not fret, there are signs that can help you see if he is ready or not.

Marry me
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According to Statistics South Africa's latest Marriages and Divorces report, the number of people getting married has dropped dramatically in the past 10 years.

This points to more people than ever before not seeing marriage as important. But if you are one of those that has marriage as a goal in your relationship, it is important that you know whether your partner has the same intention.

The good thing is that there are signs that you can look out for to see if he is ready to settle down with you and commit.

- That's a "no" to marriage

One of the first signs is if he tells you that he is just not ready for marriage yet. As much as you would like to commit, if he tells you he is not ready, forcing him to marry you or constantly nagging him about when he is going to marry you will not solve the problem. So it might be best to consider whether you are ready to wait for him to be ready or to move on to a relationship with someone who is ready to settle down.

- He always avoids the subject of marriage

If your partner never wants to talk about marriage, it may be an indication that he is not intending on getting married anytime soon and is avoiding giving you false hope.

- He indicates that marriage scares him

Of course marriage is not pap and vleis. With the divorce rate at an all-time high in South Africa, some people might be scared of committing in case their marriage ends in divorce. But the truth is, fear should not stand in the way of committing to the one you love.

- He won’t let you meet his family

Most people who are ready to commit will let you meet the most important people in their lives such as their parents. But if your partner isn’t ready to show you off to his family or never takes you with him to family functions, it may be a sign that he isn’t intending on making you part of the family.

- If his priorities are mixed up

If your partner is only concerned about living a flashy lifestyle, going out to parties, and spending time with his friends, and not showing any signs of saving towards buying a house, paying off debts, or developing himself, he may not be ready to commit and settle down. You do not want to find yourself married to someone who does not know how to prioritise.

- He disregards your feelings

Someone who is ready to commit to you will value your feelings. But if you find that your partner is selfish and only cares about his own feelings, it may be an indication he does not view you as someone who is valuable in his life and is not ready to commit to you.

Have you ever been in a relationship where your other half was not keen on committing to you? Let us know in the comments section below.

Also read: Criselda Dudumashe on healing from childhood sexual abuse and finding love

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