Is it wrong to tell your wedding guests not to bring a plus one, even if it's their spouse?

Is it wrong to tell your wedding guests not to bring a plus one, even if it's their spouse?

Guests complained after a bride refused to allow them to bring a plus one. Do you think this bride was right or wrong? 

Wedding invitation
Wedding invitation/ iStock

The guest list is very important when planning a wedding. 

With the high cost of catering and other associated wedding costs, couples cannot afford to invite everyone. 

But, even with a limited number, in most cases, those who are invited can bring a plus one, especially if the person is their spouse. 

One Reddit user says she got into trouble with her guests after she said they are not allowed to bring a plus one. 

"I'm getting married and like every other bride, I too have certain rules I want for my wedding to go smoothly. One of them is the no plus ones rule. Only people named in the invitation are invited," she wrote on Reddit

This rule even applied to those who are married or have been in long-term relationships. 

"That also excludes long term relationships, engaged couple and married couples as well. We know it might seem harsh but those are the rules we've decided to set so we can be more comfortable. It has nothing to do with budget or venue capacity. Purely our choice," she wrote on Reddit. 

She added that if anyone wanted to bring a guest, then the guest needed to meet a certain criteria. 

"The criteria I have for people who will get to bring their partners are both me and my fiancé know of your partner and have met them. If I know your partner and my fiancé doesn't, that disqualifies them and vice versa. If I'd personally go to dinner with you and your partner. If I'd invite your partner as a separate person anyway and not just because they're your partner. If your partner is also a friend of mine. Those who meet that criteria get to bring their partners. If they don't, then they don't bring them. Simple," she wrote on Reddit. 

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Sadly, this did not sit well with some of her guests. 

"Several people have denied the invitation to our wedding due to these rules," she wrote on Reddit. 

The bride was upset by people declining her invite. However, many of those who commented didn't blame her guests. 

"You want people to come celebrate your marriage and your relationship by asking them to leave their spouse or long term partner at home? You are misusing the word plus one. That is intended for truly single people. Established couples are to be treated as a unit. Sure. Your wedding and your rules and all that bull**it, but if you create bull**it rules like this you have to expect people to decline. If I had a relative tell me my spouse wasn’t invited because circumstances hadn’t allowed the two of them to meet yet, I’d decline, too," wrote one Reddit user. 

"Forget just the invitation, don’t even expect gifts. If my husband wasn’t invited and I was told what the basis for his exclusion was, I would not being doing the “polite” gesture of still sending a gift. If my husband’s presence is so intolerable, that you’d rather have me not attend than him accompany me, then we won’t impose our presence in gift/money form either," another user wrote. 

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Image courtesy of iStock/ Eik Scott

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