Vote for the best joke in the world

Darren and the team are on a mission to find the Best Joke in the World. 

Aside from taking the title, the winner also gets R10 000. 

Here’s a look at your top five. Now we need YOU to vote for the best two!

Joke 1:

Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, “I can make the boss give me a day off.” The man replies, “And how would you do that?” The woman says. “Just wait and see.” 

She then hangs upside down from the ceiling. The Boss comes in and says, “What are you doing?” The woman replies “I am a light bulb.” The boss then says “You’ve been working so much that I think you have gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off.”

She heads off towards the door, and the man starts to follow her and the boss say “Where are you going?”

The man says, “I’m going home too! I can’t work in the dark!”

Joke 2:

Why did the Mexican push his wife off da cliff?    
Tequila!!! (Te-Keel-Her)

Joke 3:

There were three nuns painting a room and it started to get hot in the room so they took their clothes off. A few minutes later there was knock on the door and one of the nuns said “ Who is it?”

The person at the door said “Blind man”

So they let him in, thinking that he was blind.

As he walked in the guy said “Nice boobs sister, now where do you want the blinds?”

Joke 4:

There was a newly married couple on their way from Pietermaritzburg to Durban to celebrate their honeymoon. 

While driving the hubby put his hand onto his new wife’s thigh. She looked at him suggestively and said "We are married now so you can go further if you want."

The husband drove all the way to Stanger!

Joke 5:

A guy walks into the bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he is at the bar his monkey jumps all over the place and starts eating everything behind the bar. The monkey proceeds to jump onto the pool table, where he swallows the cue ball. The bartender screams “hey, your monkey ate the cue ball!”

The guy responds, “Sorry mate, he eats everything. I will pay for a new cue ball.” 

He finishes his beer, gathers his monkey up, and leaves. 

Two weeks later he returns, once again with his monkey. Again, he orders a beer and as he takes his first sip, the monkey jumps onto the table. He grabs a cherry and puts it into his bum.

The disgusted barman shouts “Did you see what your bloody monkey did?” 

The guy says: “Yeah, he still eats everything in site. But since he swallowed the cue ball, he measures stuff first.”

Which joke made you giggle? 

If you'd like to hear them rather than read them, take a listen to Darren, Natarah and Gabriel tell the Best Jokes in The World here:

Now we need YOUR help! Which joke deserves R10 000? Vote for the top two best jokes in the comments section below.